Sunday, September 5, 2010

A Heart Felt Reminiscence

“I like my dad better who fondly wakes me up like the morning sun  ... I likes my dad better who melt in heart; any time I weeps...”

These lines are  borrowed from a beautiful & insightful song in my mother tongue Malayalam.

"Sooryanaay thazhuki urakkamunarthumen , Achaneyaanenikkishtam…
Njanonnu karayumbol ariyaathe urukumen achaneyaanenikkishtam"



Its three months since I lost my dad …

Without whom, I wouldn’t have had the dawn in my life …

It was he who woke me up to the tough realities in this world …
It was he who showed me the stars in the sky when I was a kid…
It was from him that I learned there are whole lots of mysteries yet to be solved…
It was he who taught me to think , ....to think outside all the man made constraints and considerations…
It was he who taught me to appreciate the good, above & beyond the considerations of race, cast creed, religion, color ….
It was his personality that inspired me to frame my own thesis for anything tangible & intangible, for anything quantitative & qualitative...
It was his personality that inspired me to validate my theories & learn the lessons for life…

It was he who taught me that, things may not be the same as it looks & People may not be same; as they profess …

It was he who taught me, not to expect anything from anyone around… and don’t panic when you are deprived of your trust & faith…
It was he who taught me that, only myself responsible for building my life…
It was he who frowned at the excessive materialistic greed & taught me how valuable the ideals & principles in life are...


Though not spoken loudly, I could always feel the heartfelt affection that flows to me from his heart…
Like the light from the Sun which flows in abundance…

I could feel his silent weeps & restlessness, on any little disparage I ran into, in reality that was the only penalty I ever had from my dad for my mistakes…
In fact It served as the biggest motivation in my life … the motivation to repay the 'abundance of affection' I received from him… by striving hard to live up to his expectation ..
The motivation to repay the sleepless nights of my dad … by striving hard to live up to his expectation ..

The motivation to fight against all odds & come up…



Ever since he passed away; not a single day has gone without me feeling his presence …. However my eyes turn tearful & heart sobs, seeing his portrait on the wall. I feel the lonesome, in missing the one who wished & prayed in all his sincerity & honesty - for my good & good alone; as no one else in this world would have done for me.

“Ariyillenikkethu vaakkinaal achane Vaazhthumennariyilla innum.  Ezhuthumee snehaaksharangalkum appuram Anupama sankalpam achan”

[I don’t know what word can be used to praise my dad…
Beyond these letters of love, an incomparable, unparalleled ‘thought’ is my Dad ..]


I prostrate before my beloved dad’s spirit of love… affectionately & gratefully. With all my earnestly, pray to almighty for the blessing, to have this protection of his profound love in rest of my life & in my life outside the human body …. in the world unknown…

3 comments:

  1. A very touching piece of writing from you...

    Sooryanaay thazhuki urakkamunarthumen….. is the song I wanted to perform in a stage since my father passed away! Unfortunately the opportunity did not come so far !

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  2. A beautiful tribute ...thanks for sharing!

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  3. Nice post Tom.. That was my fav song too.. but i stopped listening since the day i lost my dad..its hard to hear that song now...

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